Reasons why direct mail marketing does not work

[fancytalk]

Marketers send direct mail to the wrong people.

Evidence - Today I received a letter inviting me to become a member of the Veterans of Foreign Wars of the United States. My name was referred during a "nationwide search for the select individuals who have served our nation overseas in the United States Armed Forces at a time of foreign conflict or action".

Um, last time I checked, I hadn't served in any branch of the US military.

What makes the letter even more funny is the criteria for membership - (you have to have one of these) 1. served in Korea, 2. received hostile fire/imminent danger pay or 3. received a campaign medal or ribbon for service overseas during time of conflict. They also have nice little pictures of all the medals. And of course if this applied to me I would have to sign the pledge that begins "in the presence of Almighty God".

Comments

[curefreak.livejournal.com]

I think this letter proves that you have a split personality. You thought you were living the life of a pacifist, when in actual fact you were in the army, practicing to become a mercinary. Now at least you know why you felt tired all the time *GRIN*

[yesimthegirl.livejournal.com]

That explains all the voices in my head.
I'm glad you're smart. I was having a hard time figuring that one out.

[curefreak.livejournal.com]

Me smart??? Now I know you are taking the piss ;)

Oh and thanks to you I have had "Too drunk, to fuck" stuck in my head all afternoon! :)

[yesimthegirl.livejournal.com]

Now I wish you could hear Nouvelle Vague's remake of "Too drunk to fuck". It is hilarious. Wait, you might be able to *goes off for quick google search*
Nouvelle Vague (http://www.nouvellesvagues.com/english/discog.html)

Ah, fooey! You used to be able to listen to the whole album all the way through. But they have "A Forest" and a couple of others still listenable.